Food and Wine with the “Gabors”

In what has become a Mother’s Day tradition(see previous posts here and here), I joined the women in my family for lunch at a winery the Saturday before Mother’s Day. It’s a great opportunity to catch up with family news and encourage one another with good food and some liquid refreshment.

My mother and her sister’s never fail to entertain and once again they earned their nickname “The Gabors.” Now I don’t know about you, but when I think of the Gabor sister’s I think of jewels, rich living and feather boas. It is for that reason that I made each one a wine glass with it’s own pink feather boa (see picture above). They were a huge hit.

One of the things that Gabor’s are good at is encouragement. This year we celebrated with my cousin and Junior Gabor, Vicki. After two years, she has just met her weight loss goal of 97lbs. I think that deserves a huge standing ovation and I am very proud of her accomplishment. Way to go Vicki.

I hope you all had a lovely weekend and got to celebrate it in a special way.

Cheers Daaahling,

Suzanne Santillan

Writing on the Sidewalk

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Reasons to Procrastinate #457- I got caught checking out The Wayback Machine

I am currently in the process of helping a client revive a website had been allowed to wither to obscurity. One of the biggest challenges I have found in putting together a website is gathering the content matter for the site. It’s wonderful to know what pages you want, but sometimes it’s tough to know what to put on those pages. I had an even bigger problem with this client, since he had already had a site, but could not remember what pages or details he had on his site.

Son #1 suggested that I check out The Wayback Machine. Now I have to admit, the first thing that came to mind was the old Mr. Peabody and Sherman cartoon from my childhood. But I don’t think that Son#2 had ever even seen that cartoon.

Son#2 explained that The Wayback Machine is a digital time capsule. The service enables users to see archived versions of web pages across time. You simply select a website type in the url and select a date. The Wayback Machine will show you what that site looked like on that day.

I guess what they say is true, that once something is posted on the internet, it doesn’t truly go away.

Here is a screenshot of the very first Google page from 1998:

Amazing how things change!

Warning! This could get addicting and keep you from doing your writing. Be sure to check this out only if you aren’t on a deadline or should be doing something else.

Suzanne Santillan,

Writing on the Sidewalk

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Keeping It Real

I thought today’s post – which was going to be yesterday’s post – was going to be my thoughts on Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell. In short: Like so many other people, I loved it. But really, if you need convincing, you should just read John Green’s review for the New York Times. I agree with him. One thing I’ll add is Eleanor and Park helped me realize why I can’t stand the 80′s music I hear on the radio – my oldest boy-child thinks I’m a traitor to my generation. But it’s because it’s not the ’80s music I was listening to.

Today I’m thinking about realistic fiction. It’s absolutely my genre of choice, and always has been. There have been fantasy/magical/paranormal books that have captured my heart, but, in the way that the masses love non-fiction that reads like fiction, I prefer fantasy that feels real. (To the point of looking up the possibility of carnivorous horses after reading Scorpio Races.)

Why do I love realistic fiction?

• The best books help me get to know people better. By getting inside the head of one specific character, I feel like I learn to better understand people in general. I gain new insight as to why someone might make a certain choice. 
• Conversely, I often feel better understood. I see that someone else feels and thinks like I do. I’m not alone in the universe.
• In my opinion, I think authors of realistic fiction have to work harder to be compelling and memorable. The writing has to shine – the story can’t rely on a cool premise alone.
• Realistic fiction is more likely to be a stand-alone story. At this point in my life, I am realizing I will never be able to read every book that I’d like to. Trilogies and series are such a commitment. And, quite honestly, even when I’ve loved a first book in a trilogy, there have been very few second books that are good enough to make me want to read the third.

Keeping it real.

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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The Line Between Habit and Problem

I got bumped at the library yesterday.

Denied. Sent away.

Armed with a stack of books needed for teaching my class on Saturday – with my students and co-teacher, Andrea counting on me to deliver – I reached my limit of check-outs.

Even though I’d just returned a stack of books as I walked in the door, I still didn’t have enough currency to finish my “shopping.”

So I went home to gather more books to return. I have to make some trade-ins. There were a few I’d been hanging on to. They’d been read, but I loved them enough to think I might want to reread at least a section or two. Not this time. They gotta go back.

But I still have an enormous stack of books – and they’re novels, not picture books – that I must read.

Agony. Misery. Time to make some hard decisions.

The first step is admitting there’s a problem.

There’s not, in case you were wondering. I can totally read all these books.

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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Spotlight on Mother-Daughter Book Clubs

One motherly regret (that I’m willing to admit publicly) is that I never participated in a mother-daughter book club. Curious as to what the girl-child and I missed out on, I’ve convinced my dear friend Sharry Wright into sharing some of her tips for planning and facilitating a mother-daughter book club. 

After you read this post, be sure to check out Sharry’s lovely blog, Kissing the Earth, which she authors with fellow author, Tamara Ellis Smith. It’s chocked full of gorgeousness in both word and image form.

Hi Sharry! Thanks for being here on WOTS today!

Hi Sarah! Thanks so much for asking me to talk a little about one the most favorite things I get to do—work as a moderator for mother-daughter book clubs!

Please describe your group to us. 

Right now I have one group of five mothers and their third grade daughters and one group of five moms and sixth grade girls. And another group of third graders starting up soon. I let the moms decide a meeting time that best fits their busy family schedules.

How often do you meet?

We meet about once a month. The younger group meets for two hours on Sunday afternoons, the older group for two hours on a Monday or Tuesday evening. They take turns hosting at their homes—the host provides tea and sweets for the Sunday group and a light supper for the older group.

Sounds delightful!

How are the books chosen?

The hosting girl chooses the book to read and discuss from a choice of three that I give her—three books that I think she will especially enjoy, but will also be appropriate for the whole group and make for a lively and rich discussion. Then a week before the meeting, I correspond with the hosting mom and daughter to help them come up with four or five discussion questions. At the meeting, I start the discussion and then turn it over to the hosting girl, moderating as needed to keep the discussion on track and on time.

What kind of book leads to a good discussion?

I have found that the books that make for the best discussions are those with some ‘meat on their bones’ so to speak. I try to only offer well-written books with well-rounded characters that both the girls and moms can invest in. I look for stories with strong thematic threads, with characters in difficult situations who have to make difficult choices and do things that are hard for them to do. Some of the best discussions come from the question—how would YOU act, feel, respond in the same situation? We’ve had some great discussions about characters who were forced to stretch and grow, or characters that had to face their flaws and the flaws of others.

As you well know, one of the great benefits of coming out of the MFA in Writing For Children and Young Adults from Vermont College of Fine Arts where we basically lived and breathed children’s literature around the clock for two years, was the entry into a lifelong community of children’s book writers, teachers and librarians who all share this love of reading, writing, teaching and discussing Middle Grade and Young Adult literature and are fantastic resources for recommending great books. 

Are there any taboo topics? 

In terms of taboos, I do try to keep the books we read age appropriate. I’ve had, on occasion, one of the girls with an older sibling ask if we can read a certain book that I know is too sexual or too violent for six graders, too scary or upsetting for third graders. And I have made a solemn vow to both my groups that I will never bring them a book where the dog is killed!

GOOD CALL! No dead dogs!

Any recommendations for others wanting to form their own group?

For anyone interested in starting a mother daughter book club, I say, do it! I was lucky enough to enjoy many years of mother daughter book clubs with both of my girls (now 22 and 25!) from the time they were 9, well into high school. My girls and I look back on the time we spent reading and discussing books together as incredibly precious and valuable. 

I would recommend keeping the group manageable—five or six mothers and daughters makes for a nice sized group. Use your local children’s librarian and independent bookstore children’s book buyer as resources—they love to talk about and recommend great books! If you don’t want to meet in each other’s homes, most libraries have a public meeting room you can reserve for book club meetings.

Thanks so much for being here, Sharry!

If anyone has any questions about parent-child book clubs, ask away!

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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What’s Happened to the Fairy Tale?

In 2010 Disney Studios announced that they did not plan to produce any more animated fairy tale movies in the near future. This was a surprise move for a studio that made a good portion of it’s money from such classic movies as: Snow White, Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, and The Little Mermaid. Why, the main feature at the Disneyland Parks is Cinderella’s castle.Their logo even includes it in their icon.

 

I wondered at the time what would happen to fairy tales. Would they be pushed off to the side to be forgotten for years? Would we only find them in books that we shared with our children?

It seems, this was not the future of fairy tales at all. Hollywood took up the reins and has created grittier, more gruesome versions of these classic tales. Movies such as: 

Hansel and Gretel- Witch Hunters

 

Snow White and the Huntsman

Jack the Giant Slayer

These movies, in addition to the television shows Once Upon a Time and Grimm have assured that these classic tales are not hidden in the corner.

As an author, I  am fascinated by the changes and twists the writers have done to these classic tales. The creation of the fantasy worlds and how they portray them on the screen is amazing. But I can’t but miss the softness and humor of the old Disney versions.

It will be interesting to see what the future holds.

Happy writing,

Suzanne Santillan

Writing on the Sidewalk

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It’s My Mother’s Fault

I bought a bottle of moonshine last October.

It’s sitting on my kitchen counter, unopened. I haven’t quite had the nerve to drink it. But I like that it’s there to greet me every morning.

I picked it up when I, along with my sister and one of my brothers, went to visit my mother for her birthday. So what did we do for Mom’s birthday weekend? Well, what every grandmother of a certain respectable age wants to do for a significant birthday. We drove a few hours in order to tour Stillhouse Distillery at Belmont Farms, where they make and sell “legal moonshine.” Besides the fact that the terms legal and moonshine contradict each other, they run a pretty nifty tour of their operation. We were able to see all the necessary bits of equipment, including peeking in and smelling the gigantic vat of liquor.

I’m sure Mom had a wonderful time. 

Okay, so maybe that’s not really what she wanted to do for her birthday, but she was willing, even though I’d already toured Ballast Point brewery and distillery here in San Diego. (They don’t claim to make moonshine as they’re sticklers for accuracy, but they make an assortment of spirits – whiskey, rum, gin, vodka, etc.) Although I was pretty sure I had a fair grasp of how to make whiskey, I wanted to see it done, Virginia-style.

I even met Moonshiner Tim, star of the Discovery show, Moonshiners. 

My mother played along because she’s a good sport. But, after all, it’s her fault that I’ve been obsessed with moonshine whiskey production for the last year or more.

She’s the one who said something along the lines of “Why don’t you write about your high school adventures?” My sister and I had one of our hysterical laugh moments over that idea. (Sorry, Mom.) But then, all of a sudden I was writing about a small town in Virginia. And a girl who wanted to leave.

And yes, eventually moonshine seeped in too.

Not that it’s a true story. At least, not all of it.

Thanks, Mom…

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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I Love Schools

Virtually all my life I have spent a large portion of my life somehow connected to public schools.

I went to school the typical amount of time and loved the experience, most of the time. Except perhaps, middle school. But once I graduated from college I taught middle school ~ and all of a sudden I had a new view on those years. In the right light, with my eyes squinted I could muster an almost sentimental appreciation for those years of sheer awkwardness. (Not that I would ever want to live through them again!)

By the time I gave up teaching, I had a child enrolled in school. I volunteered in the classroom and around the school in all sorts of ways; three kids’ worth. Then I took a very part time job at that same school, which eventually grew into a slightly more time job. My job has changed again recently. Now I am traveling around to different schools. I get to spend time in schools full of kids of all ages. From preschool to high school.

We hear so many sad tales of hardship. In the news and around the internet. As a writer, or maybe just as a human, I am drawn to problems, to issues, to the struggles of children and their families – and neighborhoods.

They are there, for sure.

And, definitely in San Diego, schools are struggling. They are operating on bare, raw, minimal budgets.

But, the thing I’m struck by most, as I pop in and out of so many different schools, is… I love them all so much.

I love schools.

I love the kids attending them and I love the adults who greet them at the door. Who work with passion and drive to keep schools being what they are – a safe haven, a place for dreams and hopes to be planted and nurtured, a ticket to the future.

Because this is supposed to be a blog about writing and reading, I want to mention a recent “school book” read: Because of Mr. Terupt by Rob Buyea. Highly recommended, this story is told from various points of view of the students in one classroom. It’s funny and sweet, touching and heartbreaking, ultimately hopeful and inspiring.

Just like school.

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto

Neither of my boys are very sports minded. It’s not that I didn’t try. Like all of the other mother’s, I signed them up for baseball, soccer, and swimming. But it became apparent very early on, that  aside from swimming, the whole team sport thing was just not going to work. So we quietly retired from the sports scene and moved on to other activities to keep our boys busy. As a result, we did not spend a lot of time sitting in bleachers or experiencing that nail biting tension when your child competes.

This past year Son #2 joined a FIRST robotics team and I suddenly found myself inventing new ways to find comfort on hard bleachers, cheering with their triumphs and trying to be encouraging when things just didn’t go right.

If you aren’t familiar with FIRST it is a program designed to inspire young people to be science and technology leaders, by engaging them in exciting mentor-based programs that build science, engineering and technology skills, that inspire innovation, and that foster well-rounded life capabilities including self-confidence, communication, and leadership.

Two of the core values at these competitions are: Gracious Professionalism and Coopertition.

According to FIRST:

Gracious Professionalism is part of the ethos of FIRST. It’s a way of doing things that encourages high-quality work, emphasizes the value of others, and respects individuals and the community.

With Gracious Professionalism, fierce competition and mutual gain are not separate notions. Gracious professionals learn and compete like crazy, but treat one another with respect and kindness in the process. They avoid treating anyone like losers. No chest thumping tough talk, but no sticky-sweet platitudes either. Knowledge, competition, and empathy are comfortably blended.

Coopertition is displaying unqualified kindness and respect in the face of fierce competition. Coopertition is founded on the concept and a philosophy that teams can and should help and cooperate with each other even as they compete.

Coopertition involves learning from teammates. It is teaching teammates. It is learning from Mentors. And it is managing and being managed. Coopertition means competing always, but assisting and enabling others when you can.

 

As a parent, it’s amazing to see Gracious Professionalism and Coopertition in action. When Son#2′s robot experienced a catastrophic injury to their robot, several teams stepped forward to help rebuild and offer parts to help them continue to compete.

I’m sorry to say that Son#2′s team did not move on to the semi-finals in his region, but the team is already talking about next year.

To give you an idea of what FIRST robotics is all about, here is a cool video to show you some of the previous competitions:

Now that the season is over, It’s time to get back to my writing.

Suzanne Santillan

Writing on the Sidewalk

 

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Long Weekend

One good thing about working is getting a long weekend. I will be using mine to write, read and watch a baseball tournament.

And look what I get to read! I was a lucky winner of a give-away from the industrious (and numerous) authors over at Ya Outside the Lines. Surprises have been arriving – from all over the country – through my mail slot – such fun to get presents! Perfect timing.

TRY NOT TO BREATHE by Jennifer R. Hubbbard. Learning to live is more than just choosing not to die, as sixteen-year-old Ryan discovers in the year following his suicide attempt. Despite his mother’s anxious hovering and the rumors at school, he’s trying to forget the darkness from which he has escaped. But it doesn’t help that he’s still hiding guilty secrets, or that he longs for a girl who may not return his feelings. Then he befriends Nicki, who is using psychics to seek contact with her dead father. This unlikely friendship thaws Ryan to the point where he can face the worst in himself. He and Nicki confide in one another the things they never thought they’d tell anyone—but their confessions are trickier than they seem, and the fallout tests the bounds of friendship and forgiveness.

I absolutely loved her first book, THE SECRET YEAR and thoroughly enjoy her blog. (It’s quite likely that I found YA Outside the Lines through her blog in the first place.)

GIRL STOLEN by April Henry ~ the U.K. version. Sixteen-year-old Cheyenne Wilder is asleep in the back of her mom’s car when it’s stolen from the pharmacy parking lot. Cheyenne is not only sick with pneumonia—she’s also blind. Griffin, the teenager who was stealing packages out of parked cars, hadn’t meant to kidnap her; he just impulsively stole the car with her in it. But once Griffin’s dad finds out that Cheyenne’s father is the president of Nike, everything changes—now there’s a reason to keep her. Will Cheyenne be able to survive this harrowing ordeal and escape? And if so, at what price?

PRETTY AMY by Lisa Burstein.

Amy is fine living in the shadows of beautiful Lila and uber-cool Cassie, because at least she’s somewhat beautiful and uber-cool by association. But when their dates stand them up for prom, and the girls take matters into their own hands—earning them a night in jail outfitted in satin, stilettos, and Spanx—Amy discovers even a prom spent in handcuffs might be better than the humiliating “rehabilitation techniques” now filling up her summer. Even worse, with Lila and Cassie parentally banned, Amy feels like she has nothing—like she is nothing.

Navigating unlikely alliances with her new coworker, two very different boys, and possibly even her parents, Amy struggles to decide if it’s worth being a best friend when it makes you a public enemy. Bringing readers along on an often hilarious and heartwarming journey, Amy finds that maybe getting a life only happens once you think your life is over.

Thanks, YA Outside the Lines!

Sarah Wones Tomp

WRITING ON THE SIDEWALK

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